Courtesan- Tawaif

Disclaimer: This article is by no means written to urge people to love tawaifs or celebrate them nor written to bash people but to find out and to understand the answers to the many questions that have wreaked havoc in my mind. If any one of you can answer all these questions of mine logically and explain them thouroughly, I promise I'll change my views. So please hear me out with an open mind, try to persuade me than argue for as Rumi said and I quote: "Raise you words, not your voice. It is rain that grows flowers not thunder." If you can't provide me with concrete points and change my views and neither could I through this article change yours, then lets agree to disagree.

Ever wondered why hearing or reading the word tawaif (courtesan) makes us uncomfortable? The first time I heard this word was in the drama "Mai Abdul Qadir hun" and at that time I didn't know what this word meant so I asked my family, who was watching the show along with me, the meaning of this word only to be met by pregnant silence. One of my elder male cousins dared to tell me that a tawaif was a prostitute only to be bashed by my family for uttering the word. It was a bit weird but after hearing that it meant a prostitue even I ended up getting a bit uneasy for asking this question and so I resigned to saying an ohh in order to break the awkward silence. To be honest at that time I didn't think much about it, but when my mother and I watched the tarang telefilm Anjuman, I was astonished to find out that even tawaifs had types. For so long have I only been aware of one type of Tawaif- prostitute- one who dances and warms people bed.  I was oblivious to the existence of another rarer type of Tawaif- dancer- one who only dances esp. does mujra, belly dance etc. and not becomes a notch in someone's bed post. Because the only category I was familiar with and was bred in the bone to classify them under was bad and immodest women (buri aur behooda auraten). There was no other type for them as they were the types not to be talked about let alone chance to meet, mingle or befriend. The telefilm actually piqued my interest in tawaifs and so I researched about them only to be more baffled by the results. Tawaifs were highly sophistated courtesans who rose to fame esp. during the Mughal era for they were proficient in literature, dance, music,  and theatre and therefore, were chosen to serve the nobility and inculcate in them etiquettes. Quite mindboggling isn't it? Never thought sophistication, etiquettes and excellence would go in the same sentence as a tawaif.  

After this knowledge countless questions bombarded me and for so long have I tried to find out their answers. For instance, culture of any place is defined by their literature, music, dance, theatre and etiquettes then how come the teacher and the propagator of this culture a.k a tawaif ended up becoming a taboo? But most importantly how did this word even evolve into being a cuss word? Because I find it ironic that the culture is held in utmost regard while the teacher regarded as mud underneath the feet. Our culture is the one that dictates our lives and is our pride however, the teacher is a contemptible pest and a blotch on our reputation. 

Isn't it ironic how dancing in a wedding wearing outrageous dresses is fine but wearing the exactly same dress and dancing for money in a brothel wrong? How the same action gets to be judged so differently by the same set of people. Just because the former one isn't dancing for money rather for fun or validation, it becomes justifiable whilst the same act when done due to some plight/constraints is scorned. An actress remains an actress despite dancing in movies and doing live dances wearing skimpy clothes. Why isn't she called a tawaif? And if you consider her a tawaif then why do you watch her shows/ movies? Because last I remembered the mere utterance of the word Tawaif is a taboo in our society, one can't even have a discourse about it, so why isn't the act of watching them on TV not taboo? Why do you, I and all the boys who dance in a wedding/ mehndi remain us and retain our identities and not get labelled as a tawaif and get treated as one? 

Even though, there is a paucity of the dancer tawaifs, lets focus on them for now and try to answer some of my questions. Why is a tawaif who only dances and not warms any person's bed contemptuous? 

Is it her clothes that are skimpy/immodest? Because if so, then why isn't anybody including me, not looked down upon and called a tawaif when we dont do a hijab/ niqab for thats the only modest dressing according to Islam and anything other than that is considered immodest?

Is it her dance that is abominable? Because if so, then why isn't anybody who dances in a mehndi or a household function called a tawaif? If its about dancing being haram in Islam then why is bangra/ luddi ok? Aren't they a form of dance too? If dancing is a problem and the reason to be scorned then shouldn't any and everybody who dances be scorned? Because what is wrong is universally wrong and isn't selectively wrong to some and not to others.

Is it the gender? Because, I've never heard a boy/man being called a tawaif even when he dances in any function wearing immodest clothes according to Islam and not society/ culture. 

Is it the forbidden (haram) means of earning? Because if so, then why aren't we called a tawaif when we earn through illegal/ forbidden ways of earnings like usury/ interest (saving accounts in banks etc), bribery, black market (selling plasma of COVID-19 etc), adulteration ( putting glue/ water in milk to increase its volume, giving less petrol for the amount paid etc.), hoarding (masks, ration, sanitizer etc.) and corruption? . "Those who takes interest, pays interest and even those who record interests are cursed by the Prophet pbuh" as narrated by Jabir bin Abdullah. Then why are the cursed people not called tawaif?

Is it her interaction with many men? But then even we interact with the opposite gender on a daily basis, crack jokes and have a good time with them without doing hanky panky. Then why are we not labelled a tawaif?

Is it because they are a temptress? Because, if so, then any good looking person is seductive and has the power to lure people. When we and our parents look at marriage proposals we along with them tend to be enchanted by all those pretty faces that we see in a wedding or in a gallery of rishta wali aunty. Then why do we not label them a temptress, scrunch our nose up and call them a tawaif instead of being intent on making them our wives/ daughter in laws? Probably because the house is problematic? For a tawaif's house is a brothel and ours is a villa or a home. They live in a bazaar/ market where everything is a commodity to be sold to the highest bidder. But then I have always believed that everything and everyone in this world comes with a price tag. We are sold to our temptations, desires and greed. Just like how a tawaif is helpless and therefore, is compelled to do as ordered due to circumstances, we are helpess against our yearnings, temptations, wants, inclinations and aspirations. 

Or maybe its just the fault of our mentality that is deeply rooted in all those double standards arising from our incomplete knowledge of our faith? Because in Islam, a wrong committed by anybody be it a man or a woman, a rich or a poor, a Prophet or a common man stays wrong and is subjected to the same punishment. A tawaif be it a one who only dances or the one who warms a bed, is equally wrong and punishable as someone who watches that dance or sleeps with them. Lastly, before you backlash me, and judge all those people who are victims to their circumstances, ask yourself these two questions: "Are you that strong in faith and will power that if met with similar circumstances, you would not succumb to evil forces that compel you to go against the principles of your faith namely corruption, deceit, greed, bribery, interests and forbidden acts? Would you not be sold to your temptations and desires?

Because according to me everyone and everything in this world comes with a price tag. The fate of this price tag is however dependent on time: if its your good time, then you will be sold at a higher value or a value you get to decide, but if its your bad time then you will be sold for mere pence. Everyone is helpless some against their desires, some against greed, some against time and fate whilst some against the world.

" کیوں کی میرے نزدیک دنیا کی ہر چیز اور شخص بیکاو ہے ، جسکا وقت اچھا ہے اسکی قیمت زیادہ ، اکثر منہ مانگی قیمت اور جسکا وقت برا وہ کوریون کے دام بکنے پر مجبور . ہم سب مجبور ہیں کچھ اپنے نفس کے ہاتھوں ، کچھ اپنے ہوس کے ھاتھوں ، کچھ وقت کے ہاتھوں اور کچھ دنیا کے ھاتھوں . "

"Kyun key mere nazdeek dunya ki har cheez aur shaks bikaao hai, jiska waqt acha hai uski qeemat zyada, aksar mun mangi qeemat aur jiska waqt bura woh koriyon k daam bikney per majboor. Hum sab majboor hain kuch apne nafs k haathon, kuch apne hawas k hathon, kuch waqt k hathon aur kuch dunya k hathon."